Last week, I spent about an hour walking around Southmall and New World wondering what to eat. I spent so much time in New World that I concluded I just HAD to buy something in fear of being accused of shoplifting. Why else would you linger in one aisle for 20 minutes?.... Well.... because it's hard to decide on what to buy. I was very glad to be left to my own devices because if I had company with me, they would surely get extremely irritated at my indecisiveness.
I don't like eating out with other people, especially to places I've never been, because I don't have the sufficient amount of time to choose properly. Shopping is fun alone because I can wander around for an hour before deciding a purchase. I want to be thorough and minimise regret.
Also, last minute plans. Such a hassle. I like to be aware of the amount of spare time in my day to allocate the appropriate activities - or at least, figure out how much procrastination I can allow myself... But all that goes out the window when an unexpected event pops up and demands my time.
I know I know I'm living in a box that is unrealistic. Things happen that I can't control, I don't have all the time in the world to contemplate deeply every. single. decision. This has to stop.
So friend, how about helping me out. Ask me to hang out. Last minute. And then we should eat someplace I've never been. ..... okay, I just re-read that and got a very desperate-wanting-a-date vibe. (say nothing Bina and Gogyn!). Scratch that thought, let me be. Haha.
Anyway, the point is, I'm a freak that needs a lifetime to prepare for every decision that needs to be made. Which is a problem because apparently, this world was not founded with I in mind as the central focus. So naturally, I'm expected to go along with the flow sometimes. Which. kills. me.