Wednesday, August 29, 2012

What Goes On In This Head Of Mine

I have a very cute A4 sized notebook given to me by a friend and I write all sorts in it - thoughts, vlog ideas, homework, to-do lists, wishlists, notes of what people says, notes about things I see in my everyday life. It's like my little, portable pensive. Which is perfect because I hate forgetting.

I love archiving my life and memories. I'm the Queen of the Kingdom of Nostalgia so any thing, no matter how little is worth recording. I keep random pieces of rubbish if it meant a memory of something/someone.

I once kept a piece of Extra gum wrapping because it belonged to a boy I really liked. What, loser? Who me?? Couldn't be! But I don't know where that piece of wrapping paper is anymore, which is a good thing.
I even kept empty Lift bottles because they were drunk with special people at special times... or so I hope... because I have NO clue as to why I've kept them - fail hoarder.
I keep as much books as I can from school and about once a year, I go through them all and laugh at how stupid I was. Simple algebra was such a task to learn. Aah... fond academic memories...

The moral of the story is wear sunscreen and eat strawberries. What am I saying... the most sunscreen I wear is my SPF15 moisturiser and I only get strawberries if they're on special at New World for two packs for $5.

Back to my super awesome notebook - I write thoughts both raw and processed. I'll share some with you :)

I've been thinking about children who live in third world countries and first world ones too that aren't as privileged as I. Who don't get a chance at free education for 13 years. Who get dropped off to school if they do go. Who walk soaking wet to and from. Who have teachers who actually show up and teach. Who don't have teachers who a lot of the time pull extra weight to help them. Who don't have a chance of succeeding in what they love. Who don't even know WHAT they love doing because the focus of each day is to survive, nothing else. I'm not able to sponsor a child or have money to give to charities but what I can do is make the most of my educational blessings because WHAT an arrogant thing it would be to these deprived children to wave our free schooling in their faces and wipe our asses with it. One of the best things we can do (as oddly selfish as it sounds) for them is to fully appreciate and make the most of what we have and use it to our advantage. In respect to those who can't, let's make the most of these last few month of "horrible" school and get the best marks we can.

Funerals are sad. But I'm mostly sad because those who are living are sad. I cry most easily when I see others cry in movies and real life. So when someone I know and love dies, it doesn't actually ring true until I see how it's impacted other people's lives. Because I don't realise they're not there until the times I'd usually see them (if that makes sense). People dying makes me sad. But people crying makes me sadder.

I was at the park last week sometime writing and I saw a father and son flying their kite. One of the cutest sights.

The greater the risk, the greater the reward. I mostly think about this in the sense of meeting new people - which is the thing totally against my natural tendencies. But I could walk past someone who I could get along with like ying and yang and be a friend like no other but I'd never know if I never smile and open my mouth (with words coming out mind you, I suspect simply opening and closing one's mouth like a fish may deter people rather than attract them). Or I could just totally go all awkward turtle on them and they walk away in disgust or confusion. Nonetheless I shall talk to more people.

That's enough for now. I want to stop typing because mum is sleeping right next to me and I might wake her up. Okies, goodnight for now :)


  1. read it again TUI, you know who this is ;) hahaha

    hint - CPS

  2. I agree about deaths. I'm quite happy to die (emo much), but it makes me sad when I think about leaving behind my Lali lady, Barty, Huberians, the Gynes, etc etc. Sad face.

    1. totes sadyn (I just found this comment NOW because apparently, blogger thought it was spam...)